A feather from an angel
by Libbylion
Summary: Castiel is falling from grace and unaware Dean finds a feather.     M for future chapters
1. Chapter 1

A feather from an Angel

It was a gloomy day outside as Dean sat on the couch by the window in Bobby's study. Bobby was at his desk with an old book open and Sam was sitting on the opposite side of the desk on his laptop. With the apocalypse in full swing they were trying to desperately find a way to kill Lucifer to end it all. Dean himself wasn't much for reading but he too had a book on his lap scanning though to find anything on how to kill the devil. They knew about the colt but had no idea where to find it and were searching for any other possible option. The rain hit against the window the only noise in the all but silent room apart from the occasional clicking of Sam's typing on the laptop.

Dean wasn't really focused on reading, all he wanted was a nice tumbler of whiskey and a bed maybe some classic metal to listen to that would fill the silence. He was so unfocused he could have sworn that it was his tenth time reading the very same sentence. With a groan the eldest Winchester closed the book and set it to the side rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands as he leaned his elbows on his knees. He needed something to do anything but read. Eyes still closed he heard the sound of wing beats and the creaking of the other two men's chairs in reaction to who was now no doubt standing in the middle of the room. Castiel their friend and ally the man who had pulled him out of hell.

Castiel stood there still barley moving in the slightest apart from his head that scanned the room catching both Sam and Bobby's gaze and then looking to Dean though unable to catch the man's eyes as they were still covered by his own hands. Nothing was said until Bobby's grumbly voice rang out. "Cas, why'd you come?" The angel rarely showed up unless he had word on the apocalypse. Castiel finally turned his gaze away from the eldest Winchester to look at Bobby. "I came to see how you are progressing on your task of killing the devil." Castiel spoke blank expression on his face as usual. "No farther than before." Bobby replied bitterly returning back to his book.

The angel glanced around the room seeing that none of the men looked like they were about to discuss anything further. Dean finally looked up from his palms as Castiel spoke again. "Very well." With that the angel left again in another set of soft wings beats. Dean blinked a couple times focusing his eyes and silently cursing himself for not looking up earlier he had barley set eyes on the angel before he was gone. Dean would never admit it to anyone else but he had a soft spot for the man. He hid it from everyone by acting as he always had a bitter asshole who didn't give a shit when he really did.

Both of the other men decided that it was time to get something to eat and since Bobby had no food in the house they were going to the dinner just down the street from the old man's home. Bobby was heading for the front door and Sam was following behind before he turned around to look at Dean who was perched on the edge of the couch looking to the spot where the angel had just been. "Hey Dean, are you coming?" Dean shook his head looking up to his younger brother. "Yea I'll be out in a minute." Sam nodded walking outside to the Impala. Once the other men had left Dean got up from his seat to walk to the spot he had been staring at. He bent down to reach to something on the floor. In his hand he held a black feather. It was softer than any feather he had seen before and it sort of shined. He held it up into the overhead light and was able to see threw it as if it wasn't supposed to be there yet it was. He stuck it in the pocket of his jacket before his brother and Bobby got to impatient and left without him. He rushed out the house and climbed into the front seat of the Impala where Bobby and Sam already sat. Sam in the back allowing Bobby the front. He was glad the ride to the diner was silent because he was not prepared to answer any questions.

It had been just over two weeks since Dean had found the feather and he had yet to see the angel it belonged to. He was a little relieved that he hadn't because he still didn't know what he was going to say once Castiel finally did show up. He wasn't sure what it meant, he knew he shouldn't even be able to see the damn thing and it kind of worried him. That being said he didn't want to look like he was worried about the angel he had far too much pride to act like some girl from a chick flick. He also hadn't told Sam or Bobby either he thought it was best to keep this to himself he didn't want them prying at him, they did that enough without knowing of the feather.

Dean was now sat outside in the salvage yard. The sun was shining and he had a cold beer in hand. He knew he was alone so he pulled the feather from in his jacket and held it in his hand watching as the light hit off of it. It looked different now, it had become more and more solid then they day he picked it up as if the longer it was away from the angel the more real it became. He stared at it in silence rolling the softest through his fingers before hiding it away in his pocket once more to take out at another time. He knocked back his beer before he heard the familiar sound of wing beats coming from behind. Without even looking up he knew exactly who it was. Not very many angels paid them visits or knew where they were.

The angel was silent standing in the salvage yard behind the eldest Winchester. "What's up, Cas?" Dean spoke as he grabbed another beer from the cooler sat beside him. "I came to see how things were moving along, it has been some time since my last visit and I was curious to know if things have progressed further." Dean stood turning to face his friend. "Nothing has changed Cas. We don't know where to look for the colt and can't find anything else that will kill Lucifer." His voice was agitated. He was frustrated about everything including what was happening to the very man who stood in front of him as if he was the same as always and nothing was wrong. "Dean you seem un-easy. What is troubling you?" The angel stated face as blank as always though there was a concerned tone to his voice. The angel honestly caring what was troubling his charge. The hunter rolled his eyes and then took a long swig of his beer. He found the answer should have been obvious. "What's wrong? Really, you're asking me what's bothering me. It couldn't have anything to do with the fact that we are living through the god damn apocalypse, trying to complete the apparently impossible task of killing the devil, not to mention he wants to take my brother as his vessel and then there's you."

The angel simply stared at dean head tilted slightly to the side. He knew very well about the many things that must have been plaguing Dean's mind he just had never thought that he was one of them. "What do you mean then there's me Dean, I'm afraid I don't understand what I have done." Dean hadn't realized his last sentence was said aloud until the angel had repeated it. He knew it was too late now the angel would not be letting this go but he was still going to try. "Nothing, Cas just forget it okay." It was then that Castiel stepped towards the human in front of him. "Tell me what I have done to make you so upset Dean." His voice was stern as blue eyes stared into emerald green. With a huff Dean began to speak. "What's happening to you?" The angel was now even more confused. "I'm afraid I still don't understand Dean." Reaching in to his pocket the hunter pulled the feather from it. "I mean this Cas. What is this? Why can I see it and why did I find it?" Dean's voice was filled with anger and concern as he held the feather between his fingers being sure to not let it fly away in the wind. His anger slightly more prominent because Castiel didn't think to tell him what was happening.

They both stood facing each other in silence staring. Dean wasn't about to back down he needed to know what was happening. "Tell me what's happening to you, Cas?" The angel continued to look at the hunter before finally giving up. His shoulders sunk and his gaze dropped. "It really isn't a concern of yours Dean you already have enough troubles to deal with." The hunter knew that the angel was just staling. "Come on, man. I'm used to the world shitting on me. Whatever it is I can take it." Castiel let out a deep sigh before looking back at Dean. "I'm losing my grace Dean. I'm falling." Dean raised an eyebrow. "Okay, so what you're telling me you're becoming human or something and that your wings are falling out?" Castiel face showed no emotion though the look in his eye was heartbreaking. Everything that he was and had been for his entire existence was basically draining out of him. The angel had been able to feel it from the moment it started but his feathers falling from his wings was just making it more and more real to him. "My feathers yes. As my grace fades they become less and less a part of me." There was a sudden rustles and Dean could feel a strong breeze as the angel flapped his wings twice and settled them back down watching as three single feathers fell to the ground exactly the same as the one in his hand had been two weeks before. Dean didn't know what else to say. He simply raised his hand to the angel shoulder and squeezed at it comfortingly a silent apology in his eyes. Castiel accepted the small comfort offered by the hunter and then locked eyes with the man once more before he vanished.

Dean was left alone his arm still outstretched to where the angel had once been. With a loud sigh he dropped his arm. He wished he could have done more for the angel. Wished he could understand what he was going through but Dean was just a man. A man who felt guilt for being the cause of the angel's descent. Sadly the hunter had felt worse than he had before the angel came by for the visit. He couldn't pass the feeling up to just guilt though, he would admit to nothing more though. Not that he had any intention of sharing as it was. He looked to the cooler beside his chair and decided another few beers might help to take feeling away but before he did that he kneeled down picking up the three other feathers from the ground and putting all four into his pocket. He sat in his chair and watched as the sun set in front of him while drinking the last of the beer in the cooler.

Castiel hadn't gone far when he had left Dean simply far enough that the hunter couldn't feel him, or see him but the angel could see the man. He watched as Dean picked up the other feathers that had fallen. He had no knowledge as to why Dean had done so. Human behaviour still wasn't clear to him, but it made him feel warm inside for some reason. Maybe one day he would ask the hunter why he had done it but for now he simply sat from his spot on top of Bobby's home hidden as he watched the sunset with his charge. Something he had taken habit of doing every night. Dean had spent every night of the last two weeks drinking and watching the sun set. Castiel having grown a fondness of the eldest Winchester enjoyed being able to do something with the man even if only one party new about the occurrence. He would never let Dean know that he sat with him though. He finally left the rooftop to continue his work when he watched Dean walk into the house knowing he would be safe for another night.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean made his way into the house after watching the sunset. He could feel that he wasn't alone but he would never tell the angel he knew he was there. It was comforting to have someone around just to know he wasn't alone. He dragged the now empty cooler on its wheels into the kitchen of Bobby's home putting it away properly not wanting to get a lecture from the oldest hunter later. Once he was in the house he felt the angel leave and he was a little saddened by it but why would he expect Castiel to stay he had other things to do, he was still heavens servant and had a job to do. Pushing the thought aside Dean went to the fridge having not eaten anything all day he was hungry. Thankfully he and Sam had gone the store and stoked Bobby's house with food he eventually decided on making a turkey sandwich.

After he made his food he left the kitchen and walked to one of the spare bedrooms upstairs being sure it was the room with the TV. On his way to the bed Dean fetched the remote from the top of the television and then to plopped himself on the bed. He reclined back against the headboard hitting the power button and finding Dr. Sexy (MD) satisfied with what he was viewing he tossed the remote on the bed beside him and picked up his sandwich taking a large bite a small moan escaping his full mouth not realizing until now how hungry he truly was. He continued to eat and watch TV until he fell asleep. His dreams plagued with a certain falling angel and a future he was afraid of happening.

The hunter awoke the next morning by Bobby shaking him. He opened his eyes still groggy from sleep he looked up. "What is it?" The older man chuckled grabbing the plate that had somehow managed to stay nicely perched on Dean's chest half the sandwich still present. "Come on you've got a case." The eldest Winchester rubbed the sleep from his eyes and reluctantly rolled out of bed as he followed Bobby downstairs and to the kitchen. He needed something to drink. He reached into the fridge hoping to catch the neck of a beer but then remembered he had finished it off the night before on account of his little meeting with Castiel. Still needing some form of liquid he grabbed a water bottle and downed half of it in one take. "So where is the case were doing?" The older hunter leaned against the side of the counter Canton, Ohio. Some poor shmuck was found inside a silver Porsche called "The little bastard" missing half his face." That peeked Dean's interest. "Okay I'll get Sam and we'll get a move on."

Sam had been reluctant to go, thinking that they had bigger problems then some meaningless case in Ohio. But they went anyway. Having a discussion in the car on the way there. This was their first case since Sam and he had got back together. They had to start working things out again and they both knew this. Things had been rough between them the last few months because Dean didn't fully trust Sam and Sam knew it. They managed to finish the Case just the same and were now on their way to a motel until they got another case.

Dean lay on the bed closest to the door in nothing but his boxers. He was alone in the room. Sam had gone out for a drive while Dean had just wanted to relax, drink some whiskey and sleep. There was nothing good on so he was channel surfing until his eyes felt heavy and began to shut, the hunt a boredom getting to him. He was almost asleep when wing beats could be heard in the room and Castiel appeared in the center of the room. "Hello Dean." With those words the hunters eyes shot open as he stared at the angel realizing what he was currently wearing. "Damn it Cas." The hunter quickly leaned over and grabbed his shirt pulling it over his head. "I apologize Dean." The eldest Winchester simply shook his head. "Whatever. What's up Cas?"

The angel stared at his charge he didn't really have a reason for his appearance. He had just wanted to see the man again. Since the Winchester boys had been on a case he hadn't seen Dean in days now. "Does one always require a reason to appear?" Dean then rubbed his head. He knew about Cas' visit so it wasn't like this was the first time he had showed up because he could it however was the first time he made himself known to the hunter. "I guess not. You're just usually not one for random visits." Castiel tilted his head. "I can leave if you don't want me here Dean." The hunter had to hold himself back from answering to quickly not wanting to seem too eager to have the angel stay. "No I didn't mean that. You can stay."

They both stayed as they were. Dean didn't know what to do. He had never spent time alone with the angel to just spend time together. "Ugh.. You want to sit?" He offered as he stood to grab two beers from the mini fridge. When He turned around the angel had sat himself at the end of Dean's bed hands crossed in his lap and eyes to the floor. The hunter offered the beer to Castiel by holding it in front of him. "Yea I know you don't require it I'm just offering anyways." He wiggled the bottle by the neck Cas having looked up from the ground. Castiel took the bottle receiving a small smile from the hunter as he sat on the bed and cracking his own beer open and downing half. They were still silent and felt that this was going to be awkward and required more alcohol. With that thought he grabbed the bottle of whiskey from the night stand and the tumbler pouring him a drink and taking it back.

"Dean if this is awkward for you I can leave. I do not mean to bring you discomfort." Dean said nothing and downed some more whiskey. "No, No it's fine stay." The whiskey was starting to do its job and the hunter felt lighter more relaxed as he drank some more. "I l-like having you around, C-cas." His words beginning to slur a little from the liquor he had just consumed. "I find that to be untrue. If you truly did you wouldn't need to consume copious amounts of alcohol." Dean rolled his eyes. "I haven't drank that much." Making a point not to let any words come out slurred. If he wasn't cautious he would let his true feelings slip. He himself didn't understand why the alcohol had such a large affect on him. He was used to drinking so this shouldn't be happening so quickly there had to be something up with what he was drinking but he didn't care at the moment.

"Dean I should go." The angel began to lift himself from the bed and that was the last thing the hunter wanted. He reached an arm out pulling the angel back down. Castiel who was not expecting the tug on his arm became slightly unbalanced and when he was pulled back to the bed he was much closer to Dean then he had been before. "I said stay." The hunter was close and Castiel could feel his breathe on his face it smelled of Whiskey and Dean. He could feel the hunter's gaze travel over his face before emerald green locked with piercing blue. They both stayed like this for what seemed like an hour.

Being so close to the angel and being under the effect of the seemingly strong whiskey was driving Dean crazy. The voices in his head having a full out battle with themselves on what Dean should be doing. It seemed that drunken Dean and his hidden desires were winning because Dean was leaning in even closer. Glancing from those blue eyes to those perfectly chapped lips of the angel. Then it happened suddenly Dean brought his hand up to caress the slightly stubbled cheek of the man beside him before bringing their lips together in a soft kiss. The angel was caught of guard he had never been kissed before and he wasn't sure what to do though he wanted nothing more than this right now. Dean continued to kiss the angel until he kissed back moving to rest his arms on the hunter's strong shoulders carding his fingers through the soft blond spikes. Suddenly there was the shuffling of keys in the door and Dean hardly paid attention brushing his tongue across Castiel bottom lip asking for permission a small whine leaving his lips as the angel pulled away. "Why?" Dean protested. "Sam has returned I have to leave." The angel whispered and with that the angel left in a flutter of wings just before Sam walked through the door.

Dean was still staring at the spot at where Castiel had been until Sam spoke. "I got you some pie Dean." The eldest Winchester looked up to his brother and got up to collect his pie. "What were you doing when I was gone?" The hunter made his way back to the bed "Nothing just watching some TV." Dean settled back onto the bed and began to eat his pie and he could still taste the angel on his lips. Sam never pushed the question and they both spent the night in silence Dean trying to fall asleep after eating his pie. He spent over 3 hours lying there thinking about what had happened between him and the angel and how things were no doubt going to change between them and he wasn't sure what that meant for any of them. Eventually he was able to find sleep thankful for it to be empty and dreamless.


	3. Chapter 3

A Feather from a friend: Chapter 3

Dean awoke the next morning to the quiet hum of a TV infomercial and the faint rush of water from the shower. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes as he sat up hanging his legs over the side of the bed. Thinking about what had happened between him and Castiel the night before. He wasn't sure what he was going to do about it, if they were both going to act as if it never happened. He knew that that would probably be the easiest thing to do though he felt a pain in his chest at the idea of never acknowledging the kiss. There was no doubt that he had wanted to do it though, had he not been affected by the oddly strong alcohol he would have never let himself. Standing up and stretching until he heard a crack he decided that he would just simply go along with what the angel chose to do.

After slipping into his jeans he grabbed the keys off the table where Sam had left them after he pulled on his leather coat. His stomach was grumbling as he climbed into the front seat of his baby. Pulling out his cell phone he left his brother a quick text saying he was going to get some food and then backed out of the parking space. He then made his way down the street turning on the radio to drown out the silence. It was far too easy to get lost in his thoughts about a certain blue eyed angel in the quiet. Cranking the music he sang along to "Shout it out loud" by KISS as he tapped his fingers to the beat on the steering wheel. He made his way to the nearest drive through and ordered a western omelette bagel for Sammy and a sausage on an English muffin for himself along with two coffees and two hash browns. He got his food from the window paid and then headed out of the parking lot back to the hotel.

He had left the piping hot food in the center seat which meant there was plenty of room when the angel decided to take his seat beside the hunter in a flutter of wings. "Hello, Dean." The hunter jumped jolting the steering wheel to the side and veering into the center lane slightly quick to straighten back into his lane before and oncoming car rushed by. "God damn it Cas, I need a little warning. You're lucky I'm a good driver otherwise I would be dead." The angel sunk his head a little. "I do apologize, Dean." Dean looked over grabbing the angels shoulder squeezing reassuringly as he spoke. "It's okay. I guess I just need to get used to you dropping in more often." He then moved his hand from the angel to his own thigh where he taped the beat of the song on the radio.

They kept driving down the road in silence when the angel suddenly spoke up. "Dean we need to discuss what happened last night." Dean knew that this conversation was coming the moment the angel had shown up. "That, yea I'm sorry I shouldn't have done it. I know it..." His voice trailed off a little before running his fingers through his messy hair taking a deep breath and continuing. "I know I shouldn't have forced you into something. We can just forget about if you want to, just pretend it never happened." There was that little pain again about forgetting it happened, it wasn't something he was about to admit to anyone though. He reassured himself that he didn't have to promise he would never think about it again, that he could bring up the memory whenever he needed it. Dean kept his eyes on the road waiting for the response. "Is that what you want to do Dean, to just forget it?" The hunter had not expected this answer. He had thought he had forced Cas into kissing back yet the angel seemed saddened at the thought of forgetting it happened. Dean decided to pull the car to the side of the road they were nearing the motel and he had no intention of discussing this in front of his little brother even if there wasn't still some distance in their relationship. "No, not really. I figured I'd forced you into doing it I mean you're an angel, you wouldn't want to be with someone like me." Dean looked up to see his friends face which had become stern. "I am an angel Dean; you could not force me to do something I did not want."

Dean looked down to his feet on the floor. So maybe Cas did want the kiss but Dean knew he had a point why would Cas want to be with him. The angel kept his eyes forward. "I know you have kept the feathers Dean. I know you keep them in your pocket. I thought perhaps you do it because you care and that is why you kissed me. I to care about you and that is why I kissed back." He paused. "If I am mistaken though, then we will act as this never happened and nothing will change between us." Dean looked up and met Castiel's eyes when he had finally taken them from the empty road ahead. The hunter was never one for words or feelings. He couldn't figure out what words he wanted to come out but he knew that if he didn't do something the angel would leave. That's when he chose to let his instincts take over and say whatever came to mind, the very ones he had fought the night before. Though that is not what happened. His words still failed him but he was moving closer to the angel. Emerald green eyes locked with those deep blue orbs that spoke feelings the angels expression did not. Dean then closed his eyes bring his lips to Castiel's again his brain completely clear of any influence but his own. His hand moved from his thigh to run along the other man's arm and to the back of Cas' head to weave fingers through those messy dark locks. The angel had made no move to return the kiss and Dean pulled away, thinking that maybe he had made the wrong decision. He removed his hands from Castiel and straightened back in his seat only then looking to the other man's face to find his eyes closed. "Cas?" Castiel opened his eyes then and looked back to Dean. "Did I do something wrong?" The angel simply shook his head and moved the food that was between them to the back seat. "I suppose I just wasn't expecting you to do that." The angel cracked the faintest smile, Dean almost missed it. "You are awful with words though." Castiel then scooted himself closer and leaned into Dean, fingers brushing against the man's stubbled check before bringing their lips together softly. Dean was much quicker to react then Cas had been and added more pressure to the kiss moving his hand back to that messy hair. The angel brought his hands to rest on Dean's chest fingers clutching at the shirt he wore. Taking this as a sign the hunter flicked his tongue out against the angel's bottom lip and whispering against them. "Sam not gonna walk in this time." He then nipped Castiel's lip gently waiting for a response. The angel brought their lips back together parting and parting them for Dean who quickly brought their tongues together dancing and exploring the others mouth breaking apart only when he needed to catch his breath.

Foreheads pressed together the angel spoke. "Sam will be waiting for you Dean, and I believe his food is getting cold." The hunter let out a chuckle as he pulled away. "Yea I'm sure he's getting impatient. Are you coming Cas?" The angel shook his head. "I have some other things I must attend to. Perhaps I will come back later this evening if I am still welcome." Dean laughed. "Yea Cas, you're more than welcome." The angel nodded his head leaning in to leave a quick peck to the hunters lips and pulling away before either of them could get carried away. "I will see you later. Goodbye Dean." With that he was gone in a flutter of wings and Dean started his baby back up and drove back to the motel with a satisfied smile on his face. One he still had when he walked in the room with Sam's now cold sandwich. He dropped the keys on the table and passed Sam his food where he was at the table on his laptop. Clearly looking up another case while he was waiting.

Sam took the sandwich and noticed the smile on Dean's face. The youngest hunter shook his head with a laugh. "What took you so long? You looked like you just got lucky." He got up from his seat to put the cold food and coffee into the microwave. Dean took a large bite of his own food not caring whether it was cold. "Yea you could say that." He sat at the chair beside Sam's and started looking through the WebPages on the computer. "Hey throw this in there too." He handed off his coffee to Sam's out stretched hand. "You couldn't have brought my food back first?" The youngest hunter was still smiling when he sat back down with his food and the coffee's. "Quit your whining and tell me what we got."


End file.
